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Lesson Plans


Things they didn't tell you (long post)

[ Thread ][ Subject ][ Author ][ Date ]
Bunki Kramer (bkramer.ca.us)
Sat, 28 Sep 1996 14:06:51 -0700


Hi Everyone...

I haven't been participating lately, but I've been "listenin'" and enjoying
all the critique horror-story (well, I guess I shouldn't say "enjoying")
responses.

I don't see how you guys do it!!!! When I get home from teaching, I'm numb
and all I want to do is eat, read my e-mail, and go to bed1 Well, I'm
bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this Saturday morning and I've got something
ya'll might enjoy!
Carolyn Roberts and I have been bouncing a list back and forth for two
weeks and we thought you might get a kick out of it and PUT IN YOUR OWN
IDEAS!! This list was something Carolyn got from some workshop she slept
through...ha, ha...just
kidding, Carolyn...(author unknown), but we've revised and edited almost
all of it ourselves and now we lay it before you.......

THINGS THEY DIDN'T TELL YOU ABOUT TEACHING!

1. That there will be times you will break the 4-min. mile getting to the
restroom during the passing periods.
2. That you might find yourself suddenly in front of 38 students...none who
speak English and 3 of whom have no desks.
3. That the air conditioner only works in winter and the heater in summer.
4. That just when the students have their hands in plaster, there will be a
fire drill.
5. That the parents who come to open house are not the ones you need to see.
6. That the rotten kids are never sick.
7. That if you give clay to 8th graders, half of them will end up making
toilets.
8. That you will get to spend lots of your paycheck for classroom supplies.
9. That you will get laryngitis in September.
10. That you'll stop eating in the cafeteria.
11. That if you get a run in your stocking, every kid in the class will tell you
about it.
12. That after a few years, you'll stop dressing up for school.
13. That teachers do not automatically become smarter when they become
principals.
14. That you're more likely to be out sick on days that you're assigned "duty".
15. That you'll hate it when it rains.
16. That new teachers should never quit immediately after the first year. Or the
second.
17. That teaching can be lonely.
18. That you'll go through trash cans to get at things you can use in your
classroom.
19. That substitutes can write really nasty notes.
20. That just when you think your worst class can't get any worst, they do.
21. That just when you're yelling at the kids to shut up, the intercom will come
on and everyone in the office will hear your every word.
22. That good, comfortable shoes will mean more to you than new clothes.
23. That you'll never be able to completely clean out the trunk of your car.
24. That if you haven't had all the childhood diseases, now you'll get them.
25. That if you try to demonstrate something to you students, it will rarely
work.
26. That the kids will remember if you have been wearing the same clothes for
the last four days.
27. That the one day you're not at your post for early morning hall duty is the
the day the principal is making his rounds and checking.
28. That the day you're being observed by the principal, you get two new
students and you're in the second day of a three-day lesson.
29. That if you gain weight, a student will raise his hand and ask if you're
pregnant.
30. That students will always remind you when you need hair color.
31. That the day you look your worst is the day the school board visits...which
is also the day the photographer takes surprise classroom pictures.
32. That while you are in the middle of a serious classroom lesson, another
teacher will want to "borrow" 33 sheets of yellow constuction paper.
33. That if you say there's nudity or violence in a film you are showing, the
students will stay awake waiting for the good stuff.
34. That if there is a stray dog on campus, he'll find your classroom and leave
a gift.
35. That if you come out of a bar, you'll run into one of your students and
their parents.
36. That there always is a "good" class.
37. That a bulletin board display you designed can have a life span of three...
five...or even 20 more years.
38. That in a student's mind, there is no such thing as school after April.
39. That the spring season is not for "renewal"...it's for "burnout".
40. That you get to repeat it all over again for the next 30 years.

Carolyn and I would love to hear from you and add your ideas to the list. I
can't tell you how many of these things ring true to me!

Cya..........Bunki

Bunki Kramer
Los Cerros Middle School
968 Blemer Road
Danville, California 94526
bkramer.ca.us