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Re: Debbie's funeral

---------

From: National Art Education Association (naea_at_TeacherArtExchange)
Date: Tue Nov 21 2000 - 05:03:25 PST


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on 11/20/00 2:05 PM, artrageous@bigfoot.com at artrageous@bigfoot.com wrote:

<<We went to see the Vienna Choir boys at 3:00 yesterday. As they were
singing beautiful sacred songs in their sweet, high voices I thought of
you.>>

That is so sweet.....thank you for your thoughts...

Without a doubt, it was the saddest funeral I've ever attended. While there
was laughter during the service--as a friend who spoke said that Deb was the
only woman she'd ever known who sold her underpants at yard sales--it was
also emotionally leveling...

Her brother (an FBI agent) said that just two weeks before, Debbie had asked
him if he thought that she and the kids were in any danger. Through his
tears, he said he'd told her that surely her ex-husband wouldn't "stoop so
low." He completely broke down at that point and then whispered, "I was
wrong."

So I guess this tragically underscores what was said earlier in the post
about domestic violence.... It can happen anywhere, to anyone, regardless of
socio-economic status, the type of neighborhood you live in, despite the
support of family and friends....

At the end of the service, a bagpipe started playing outside of the
sanctuary, and a group of young police officers, who served as pall bearers,
carried her casket out. Then the music stopped, and there was absolute
SILENCE for 5-10 minutes as the family and 200-300 others filed out.

Outside, friends went to the children (who are 12th, 8th and 6th graders),
and seeing their tears was so very, very hard. I lost it when I saw another
one of my former students go to Deb's 8th grade son. They just held onto
each other, sobbing....

Debbie was attacked in her home on Monday afternoon, November 13th, and died
on Tuesday, November 14 of the massive head injuries she'd sustained.

Her ex-husband (a former oral surgeon, soccer coach for his kids' teams, and
classroom volunteer--1992/93) was located and arrested on Saturday, November
18th and charged with breaking and entering with the intent to commit
murder, and first degree murder.

So now these good, sensitive kids will also have to endure publicity and
hype as their father is tried for the murder of their mother....

Again, all the family has asked for, at this time, are contributions to:

The Deborah Reeves Memorial Fund
c/o The Albemarle High School Key Club
2775 Hydraulic Road
Charlottesville, VA 22901

Please note that it is with some trepidation that I continue to post these
things publicly through this forum, as I'm concerned about the privacy of
the children. Their lives will never, ever be the same, and I do not want,
in any way, to inadvertently make their situation more difficult. However,
it is my hope that as the kids see this fund grow, they will know that
they--and their mom's memory--are lovingly held in the hearts of others.

This was taken from the bulletin at Deb's funeral:

"Debbie was blessed with a caring spirit and a generous heart. She dedicated
her life to improving the lives of others--as a physical therapist, a
volunteer in the Albemarle County schools, a fund-raiser for school
programs, a helping hand to her neighbors, a care-giver for the friends of
her children, a confidante for her friends, and most importantly, a devoted
mother to her children. Generous with her time and unselfish with her
talents, she was a source of support and strength for her family and
countless members of the community.

Her engaging personality and vivacious laugh have touched many and are
remembered by all. We will miss her talkative out-going nature and boundless
energy. Her generous spirit lives on in her children and is remembered by
everyone whose lives she has touched."

Through my tears this week, I've also had to laugh at the image of Debbie
turned loose in a traditional Heaven.... If she has anything to do with it,
(and believe me, she's the type who'd try!) you'll find it an even better
place when you arrive....

Sharon
WEBSITE: http://www.bigfoot.com/~artrageous
Featuring art and art lesson plans, examples of my
artwork, genealogy resources, information about
contra dancing and Celtic music--and more!
EMAIL: artrageous@bigfoot.com
AIM: SKBK56, ArtrageousSBK, & others

Find out if there is a RAINBOWS program anywhere near these children.
Rainbows is a peer support program that helps children deal with their
grief. It is also free. check out the Rainbows website (rainbows.org).
They're based in Chicago public schools, the program is almost 20 years old
and over 700,000 children have participated.

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<HTML>
<HEAD>
<TITLE>Re: Debbie's funeral</TITLE>
</HEAD>
<BODY>
on 11/20/00 2:05 PM, artrageous@bigfoot.com at artrageous@bigfoot.com wrote=
:<BR>
<BR>
<BLOCKQUOTE><FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">&lt;&lt;We went to see the Vi=
enna Choir boys at 3:00 yesterday. &nbsp;As they were singing beautiful sacr=
ed songs in their sweet, high voices I thought of you.&gt;&gt; &nbsp;<BR>
<BR>
That is so sweet.....thank you for your thoughts...<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Without a doubt, it was the saddest funer=
al I've ever attended. &nbsp;While there was laughter during the service--as=
a friend who spoke said that Deb was the only woman she'd ever known who so=
ld her underpants at yard sales--it was also emotionally leveling...<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Her brother (an FBI agent) said that just=
two weeks before, Debbie had asked him if he thought that she and the kids =
were in any danger. &nbsp;Through his tears, he said he'd told her that sure=
ly her ex-husband wouldn't &quot;stoop so low.&quot; &nbsp;He completely bro=
ke down at that point and then whispered, &quot;I was wrong.&quot;<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">So I guess this tragically underscores wh=
at was said earlier in the post about domestic violence.... It can happen an=
ywhere, to anyone, regardless of socio-economic status, the type of neighbor=
hood you live in, despite the support of family and friends....<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">At the end of the service, a bagpipe star=
ted playing outside of the sanctuary, and a group of young police officers, =
who served as pall bearers, carried her casket out. &nbsp;Then the music sto=
pped, and there was absolute SILENCE for 5-10 minutes as the family and 200-=
300 others filed out. &nbsp;<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Outside, friends went to the children (wh=
o are 12th, 8th and 6th graders), and seeing their tears was so very, very h=
ard. &nbsp;I lost it when I saw another one of my former students go to Deb'=
s 8th grade son. &nbsp;They just held onto each other, sobbing....<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Debbie was attacked in her home on Monday=
afternoon, November 13th, and died on Tuesday, November 14 of the massive h=
ead injuries she'd sustained. &nbsp;<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Her ex-husband (a former oral surgeon, so=
ccer coach for his kids' teams, and classroom volunteer--1992/93) was locate=
d and arrested on Saturday, November 18th and charged with breaking and ente=
ring with the intent to commit murder, and first degree murder. &nbsp;<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">So now these good, sensitive kids will al=
so have to endure publicity and hype as their father is tried for the murder=
of their mother....<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Again, all the family has asked for, at t=
his time, are contributions to:<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">The Deborah Reeves Memorial Fund<BR>
c/o The Albemarle High School Key Club<BR>
2775 Hydraulic Road<BR>
Charlottesville, VA 22901<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Please note that it is with some trepidat=
ion that I continue to post these things publicly through this forum, as I'm=
concerned about the privacy of the children. Their lives will never, ever b=
e the same, and I do not want, in any way, to inadvertently make their situa=
tion more difficult. However, it is my hope that as the kids see this fund g=
row, they will know that they--and their mom's memory--are lovingly held in =
the hearts of others.<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">This was taken from the bulletin at Deb's=
funeral:<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">&quot;Debbie was blessed with a caring sp=
irit and a generous heart. She dedicated her life to improving the lives of =
others--as a physical therapist, a volunteer in the Albemarle County schools=
, a fund-raiser for school programs, a helping hand to her neighbors, a care=
-giver for the friends of her children, a confidante for her friends, and mo=
st importantly, a devoted mother to her children. Generous with her time and=
unselfish with her talents, she was a source of support and strength for he=
r family and countless members of the community.<BR>
<BR>
Her engaging personality and vivacious laugh have touched many and are reme=
mbered by all. We will miss her talkative out-going nature and boundless ene=
rgy. Her generous spirit lives on in her children and is remembered by every=
one whose lives she has touched.&quot;<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Through my tears this week, I've also had=
to laugh at the image of Debbie turned loose in a traditional Heaven.... &n=
bsp;If she has anything to do with it, (and believe me, she's the type who'd=
try!) you'll find it an even better place when you arrive....<BR>
</FONT></FONT> <BR>
<FONT SIZE=3D"2"><FONT FACE=3D"Arial">Sharon<BR>
WEBSITE: http://www.bigfoot.com/~artrageous>
Featuring art and art lesson plans, examples of my<BR>
artwork, genealogy resources, information about <BR>
contra dancing and Celtic music--and more!<BR>
EMAIL: artrageous@bigfoot.com<BR>
AIM: SKBK56, ArtrageousSBK, &amp; others<BR>
</FONT></FONT><BR>
</BLOCKQUOTE><BR>
Find out if there is a RAINBOWS program anywhere near these children. &nbsp=
;Rainbows is a peer support program that helps children deal with their grie=
f. &nbsp;It is also free. &nbsp;check out the Rainbows website (rainbows.org=
). &nbsp;They're based in Chicago public schools, the program is almost 20 y=
ears old and over 700,000 children have participated.
</BODY>
</HTML>

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