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Re: I'd love you to share......


Date: Wed May 01 2002 - 04:12:28 PDT

In a message dated 05/01/2002 12:16:43 AM Eastern Daylight Time, writes:

> I struggle with making time to exercize regularly. Maybe that's the clue.
> I'm just
> not disciplined enough to manage my time wisely? When I grow up, maybe I
> will get
> a handle on it. I keep thinking that when I retire, I will have plenty of
> time.
> But all the retired folks I know are busier now than when they were working
> fulltime!
> I'm not quite so bad as I used to be, there has been progress. But, when
> you figure
> out how to get rid of the guilt, share with me, okay?
> Sandy

O.K., Sandy, I'm here to share my secret of doing lots and ridding myself of
the guilt for not doing more. Time, energy level, goal-setting, and setting
priotities has a lot to do with it. Actually, I find that setting PRIORITIES
and making choices of what's important in my life is the most important key
to doing all I want to do and to reaching my goal of do it! That which I
don't do must just not be that important. I stopped beating myself up over
not doing everything on "my list", a long time ago.

For example, it would be great to organize all those shoe boxes of pictures
I've kept over the years. I even bought albums to put them in . Everything
sits in my closet and I could burden my mind with doing this this summer.
But, it's just not going to get done because I've chosen to allocate my time
this summer in a different direction. The key to happiness, or I should say,
to being at peace with yourself, is to decide how you REALLY want to spend
your time, and go for it! Don't waste it worrying about what you shouda,
coulda be doing.

The question of time plays a huge role. When my kids were little, or when
they were living at home, a huge chunk of my time went to mothering. It was
the most important job I had in my life and I had less time for myself. I
even chose to be a foster mom after they went to college, so my choice left
me less time to develop my painting and create my own art. Again, I was
aware and comfortable with my priorities.

Each of us has our own priorities, so I never judge how someone spends
his/her life, as we all do, or we all should do, what we feel is important
to us. Now that my kids are grown, I have the time and can direct my
energies into avenues/ways of making art for myself, find places to do it, as
well as others with whom to create it. This is something I've decided to do,
to grow personally in this way. The problem of guilt arises when we are
involved in activities that we don't feel are our priorities.

So, my friend, Sandy, as well as others, I would like to suggest setting a
goal or make a decision as to how you really want to spend your free time,
and , if life affords you the opportunity- seize the moment- go for it! Make
sure what you are doing is what you really want to do, and don't feel guilty
for not doing the rest!
Susan on Long Island