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Lesson Plans


[Fwd: Fwd: jokes]

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anne roberts (aroberts)
Wed, 01 Jul 1998 09:48:52 -0400


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Enjoy!

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Remember when...

A computer was something on TV
A window was something you hated to clean...
And RAM was the cousin of a goat...

MEG was the name of my girlfriend
And GIG was your middle finger upright
Now they all mean different things
And that really MEGA bytes

An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A cursor used profanity
A keyboard was a piano

Memory was something that you lost with age
A CD was a bank account
And if you had a 3 1\2" floppy
You hoped nobody found out

Compress was something you did to the garbage
Not something you did to a file
And if you unzipped anything in public
You'd be in jail for a while

Log on was adding wood to the fire
Hard drive was a long trip on the road
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And a backup happened to your commode

Cut you did with a pocket knife
Paste you did with glue
A web was a spider's home
And a virus was the flu

I guess I'll stick to my pad and paper
And the memory in my head
I hear nobody's been killed in a computer crash
But when it happens they wish they were dead

*********

An artist, a lawyer, and a computer scientist are discussing
the merits of a mistress.

An artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the
risk of being discovered.

A lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt,
divorce,
bankruptcy. Not worth it. Too many problems.

A computer scientist says "It's the best thing that's ever
happened to me. My wife thinks I'm with my mistress. My mistress thinks
I'm home with my wife, and I can spend all night on the computer!"

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