This next one is pretty gross in case you want to skip it.
Last fall I had a kindergarten student who was wearing loose leg shorts.
Class went well until the students were lining up and one little boy
said, "Mrs. W., there's a 'turd' on your floor." As I turned to correct
him for saying that word, I saw a brown pile of something on the floor
not 3 feet from me. I was speechless for a moment, just wanting to get
the kids out of there so I could figure out what was going on, then
said, "no, that's just some wet leaves someone tracked in." (pretty
lame, huh?) Then the same little boy said, "(child's name) done it."
By that time it was beginning to smell pretty bad in there. I called
the child's teacher, who in turn called the principal. In the mean time
I turned a trash can upside down over the whole mess because I had
another class marching in. A few minutes later the teacher, child and
principal came in. He asked where the problem was and I pointed to the
trash can. He walked right over and picked it up!! You should have
seen his face. The teacher had not told him what had happened, only
that the child had made a mess on the floor. He was expecting paint or
glue. Anyway the child told our principal that he had messed up his
pants and dumped it out his
pants leg onto the floor. It turns out he wasn't even wearing
underwear. I can't even remember all the jokes thrown my way for days.
The principal sent me a note saying he was sure I was "pooped out" and
might need to go home early. He also asked me if I was collecting
natural fertilizer for the butterfly garden outside my room. My brother
in law sent me a birthday card with this message, "Roses are red, @!#$
is brown. Go out and have a nice night on the town." A note appeared
in my mailbox with a conference form saying that they hoped my art
conference wouldn't be crappy. Some members of the local Methodist
choir(teachers) sent me a copy of a hymn entitled, "There's Crap on the
Door", but they had whited out the "D" and printed in "Fl". By the way
that word is pronounced "crepe" and means ribbon.
It might interest you to know that we have recommended counseling for
this child because this is not normal behavior for a 5 year old. Even
though we have laughed about the whole thing we are truly concerned
about the child. ann in nc